Boater cross is exciting.
It is .And I’m not the only who thinks so.
I had a chance to catch the final leg of the Liquid Skills Showdown this past September.
I rolled in for semi-finals of the Kayak International Boater Cross event. I could tell from a distance that this wasn’t just another paddling event—I could hear cheering. I’ve never heard cheering at a paddling event before. Maybe somebody swam, I thought.
Boater cross, if you haven’t seen it, is like motorcross or snow boarder cross. Four paddlers mass start and paddle like hell racing to the finish line. It’s greyhound racing without the rabbit. It’s primitive but the crowd loves it. Not only does the crowd like it; the paddlers are into it.They were high fiving at the finish line, replaying the last 30 seconds with their opponents, like children on the playground.
“Oh man, I thought I had you until I got sucked into that boil.”
“Bummer, dude.”
BOATER CROSS HAS EVERYTHING WE NEED
Boater cross has what it takes to put paddling into the extreme mainstream. Think about it, what does a sport (I use that word loosely) need to have to make it to TSN? What do dog trials and logger games have that paddling hasn’t? Head to head competition and an immediately chosen winner. Boater cross is the drama we’ve been missing.
You can have an event almost anywhere there is whitewater. No more fussing about water levels and the rules are simple enough. Let’s see if I can remember them. GO—and the first one across the finish line wins. Hand Ron MacLean the program, a few jargon words and another $400,000 and away he’ll go with the play-by-play commentary. I suspect it won’t be long before there are teams and team strategies. Boater cross will have its own breed of hockey goons whose sole purpose is taking-out the leading scorer. Fox will release a line of team jerseys. And EJ will be on the cereal box with Tony the Tiger.
Ex-Olympic slalom racers will finally be able to make it big. After they retire from amateur sports instead of joining the Icecapades they can have a professional career in boater cross. Kids will collect paddler cards of their favourite “players”. They’ll put them in their bicycle spokes and twenty years from now look back and wish they still had their David Ford rookie card. There will be rivalries between slalom and freestyle paddlers. Drug testing will be protested. It won’t be long before canoeists get in on the action with tandem boater cross. Now that’s exciting.
Freestyle paddlers will finally get the free ride they’ve been looking for. Why? Because we can sell boater cross to TV-industry big wigs. A light bulb will pop on in some producer’s head; he will think he has found this great new sport—paddling. Guys shelling peanuts sitting at bars will eat it up. Boater cross has everything they need. Beautiful locations, carnage and spectacular instant replays.
This article first appeared in the Winter 2002 issue of Rapid Magazine.
